Posted in days of the week

Poor Monday

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Do you ever get the feeling that nobody likes you? No? Just me, then.

I mean, I KNOW that people like me (I know it intellectually – emotionally I’m sometimes unsure). I have a circle of friends, some of whom I’ve known since I first moved to California. It’s just that, on Friday nights when the phone isn’t ringing and everyone is going to The Big Game, it’s easy to feel a bit like Charlie Brown.

Wait. Scratch that. It’s been a long time since I sat at home wishing that I’d been invited to a Friday Night Football game.

That’s not right either. I went to football games with friends. Memory is tricky that way. We forget things that happened and remember things that didn’t. Anyone else 100% positive that something in a dream actually happened? No? Just me then. Again.

While I might be the only one still irked because my spouse cheated on me in a dream, we’ve all fallen victim to the “Mandela effect.” As reported by UK’s Mirror in “news of the weird”, it’s “the phenomenon where people remember something incorrectly, but their recollection becomes the accepted version.” Don’t believe me? Tell me – what does the Big Bad Wolf say to the three little pigs?*

But I di-Greg (If you don’t know who Greg Kata is, you need to check out @gregisms on TikTok. No, really, go NOW. I’ll wait).

Ever feel like nobody likes you? Everybody hates you? It’s usually the EIC spreading the lie that “everybody’s out having fun without you.” Trust me, it’s a lie. One of the hardest things for me to remember is that we’re busy. “We adults”, that is. As a kid, your only job is to go to school and play. As an adult, we have to do all the things. Well, we don’t HAVE to, but we try. Most of us, at least. I don’t mean to be sexist, but men tend to be single focused while women try to multi-task.

I blame Cosmo (the magazine, not the drink). Helen Hurley Brown spent years trying to convince us that we (women) could do it all perfectly while perfectly quaffed and made up. For a woman who purported to be a “devout feminist” she certainly dedicated a lot of space reinforcing the patriarchal POV about women. Whether it’s Cosmopolitan magazine or other media (standard or social), women believe we can do it all. We spend our days working, cooking, cleaning, nursing, shopping, doing laundry, making beds and chauffeuring smaller humans around town. Oh, and let’s not forget trying to squeeze in time for a little “self-care” (tip for toddler moms – playing “Hide and DON’T Seek” will give you anywhere from 5-10 child-free minutes).

We have little to no time for ourselves, is it any wonder that we have zero time for friends? It’s ironic, really, because friendship is vitally important to our mental health – and not just because the EIC lies when the phone doesn’t ring. Remember, phones work both ways – pick up the phone and dial (or text. Whatever).

Still feeling unloved? Now you know how Monday feels. Pobrecito, everybody hates him. Her. Them. TBH I don’t know what pronoun Monday uses, but I feel sorry for it. I don’t know if this will make Monday feel better, but whenever I was feeling unloved/lonely, my mother would sing the worm song. She’d also offer to fix me a plate of worms wrapped in tinfoil. No, I don’t know why she added “wrapped in tinfoil,” but she said a lot of things I didn’t understand, including the parental fave “I’ll give you something to cry about.” I mean, I obviously have something to cry about, or I wouldn’t be crying!

*The famous line, “I’ll Huff and I’ll Puff and blow your house DOWN” has always been, “I’ll Huff and I’ll Puff and Blow your House IN”.

So tell me – did you ever play Hide and don’t seek with your kids/siblings?

Author:

Fabulous Female searching for sanity while raising two children (a teenaged female and her father) in the Southern California suburbs.

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