Au Revoir

I don’t know about you, but I am getting a little tired of loss and other four letter words. I promise, no matter what happens in the next few days, my next post will be happy (pinky swear). This weekend I lost two people who were important to me. One was a new-found forever friend, the other a woman who created a magical, safe place for people to learn and play. Vickie and Phyllis, until we meet again…

This, then, is the hard part. Not the holding on, but the letting go.  We’ve been taught that good-byes are a time of sorrow, with death being the hardest parting of them all. I chose to believe that death is not a final good-bye, but an “au revoir.” Think of the caterpillar left behind, looking in vain for his friends, and wondering at the winged creatures who flit about above him. So let us not spend our time with heavy hearts and weeping eyes. Let us choose to remember our love with joy and laughter, and raise a parting glass to those who go before us.

I can see them, with their wings of many colors, and I can hear them asking “Where have you been?”



13 responses to “Au Revoir

  1. Lovely Post. Can’t wait to see your happy posts. 🙂

    • Thank you. I was recently reminded that we cannot change the things that happen in our lives, but we CAN change the way we respond to them. Although I seem to be dealing with a storm of loss and sorrow, I’m looking for the rainbow 😉

  2. I’m sorry to hear of your losses, and look forward to hearing about new things happening in your life. Ever since I was a lil’ girl, my family has never said ‘goodbye’ to one another. We would always say ‘night’ or ‘good night’. I mean, it feels completely normal to me, but it will be the middle of the day, and when I get off the phone with my mom, dad or brother – all of us say ‘night’. People must think I’m crazy if they ever catch the ending of a phone conversation in public.

  3. Thank you. I think your family has an amazing tradition (and I believe I will steal it). It brings to mind Bob Perks’ poem “I wish you enough” about a mother and daughter who leave each other with “I love you and I wish you enough” You can find the story in its entirety here:

    I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.

    I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.

    I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.

    I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.

    I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

    I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

    I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye

  4. I agree it is not a good bye.. its an I will see you later..

  5. I’m so sorry for your loss, I am glad that you have a way of looking at it that helps you to get through.

  6. This is absolutely beautiful. I’ve always thought about the butterfly in terms of the transformation metaphor, but this is a new perspective that I fully embrace. The only guarantee we have is death, so it’s great to conclude that it’s not loss, that it is a beautiful transformation we undergo and that while ones go first, we will sure join them. You are right, though, the letting go is a skill no one I know has mastered. What a beautiful post!

  7. Thank you for sharing this post about loss and rebirth. LEtting go is an important skill.

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